I often need to speak English when I’m out of Japan. To be honest, I don’t like speaking English. I’m exhausted after the conversation because I need to find the right words with big struggle in my head.

I started English study later in my life. It’s already after the natural mastering time. In fact, when I started it, I’d already given up becoming fluent.  I thought I had only to be able to communicate somehow.

When I come back to Japan, I get relieved because I can live in Japanese language environment.  Then I understand how I feel natural staying where I can express what I feel at my will.

Also, after a long time of blanc of using Japanese language, I often think Japanese language is beautiful.  It doesn’t simply mean the sound is beautiful but it’s really fantastic because Japanese language has very very minute usage to express in detail. It’s very hard to handle the words for us Japanese too. But using the language of various feeling is really a joy of my heart.

Probably English has the same things, and I don’t know how to use them because I’m poor speaker. 

All I want to say is that expressing freely is a really release of human mind. It’s a kind of freedom of the press. Where I can’t speak my language, it’s no strange that I got stressed much and I feel like being in a jail with no right to speak.